tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17806499551437345662024-03-18T21:38:51.905-07:00Art & Soul( Living) a creative journeyNicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-74659584872056961882009-08-19T03:33:00.000-07:002009-08-19T04:44:36.347-07:00PerfectionMy mind is like muddy water with the sunrise, I'm still lost in the wild possibilities of my dreams. And so it takes some time for the gratitude to take hold and remind me of my blessings. I hate waking up on the fringe of disappointment and unmet demands. Let me dream! I keep a journal under my bed. This morning I opened it up to a passage I had quoted last fall after my previous relationship ended.<br /><em>'Therefore, despite all her excellence and the admiration of everything on earth, she was regulated to live out her life in an eternal moment of frustrated possibility and desire that could never find a home.</em>'<br />I am truly not a pessimistic person, quite the opposite, I see the best in everyone and every situation. I think that's what causes me so much frustration, I'm assuming others are seeing the same in me. A man once ended our relationship because I was "too pretty and too nice". Is there really such a thing as too-good-to-be-true? Do we need more flaws for others to see the humanness in us and feel safer with their own imperfectness? What if imperfections weren't labeled as such? What if we all allowed ourselves, our lovers, children and parents to be exactly perfect the way they are? Every human quality is an expression of the Divine, even the ugly ones. And how can anything Divine be less than wonderful? I've loved the men in my life, but that love has only grown into something deeper once, and the reason had nothing to do with time like one might think. And yes, I believe in love at first site...it's a Karmic thing. Loving is so easy for me, like I said I see the best in people. So I love them when their irresponsible because I can see the child that wants to be free. I love them when their jealous because I see I'm already of value. I love them when their angry because I know they're really just vulnerable. Before you think I've lost my mind know that there has to be balance, any of these emotions in excess will hurt and destroy what's cherished the most. So the point...perfection. We are all perfect and the goal isn't to go naively through life with rose colored glasses on but to learn to see the essence, the soul if you will, in those around you. We are not all good fits for one another but we all have something to bring to the table and teach. And the lessons, if we're paying attention, always teach us more about ourselves.Nicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-12412898930299309272009-08-18T18:15:00.001-07:002009-08-18T18:19:04.225-07:00An 8 year olds musings...<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghLgsdGjPPEcwsH6jCNC0XFPfXZJPUyFXUxHRp4XbcwJI6ugmyNtEqO6xKcz87rqoBFZIZUKibMnbTOcBI-BZJ81fZ6dLtEUNP_DzJ27ux-13Y7HyiGNlOspl3M_yni-Mb7CVkmryVjY4/s1600-h/001.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 286px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghLgsdGjPPEcwsH6jCNC0XFPfXZJPUyFXUxHRp4XbcwJI6ugmyNtEqO6xKcz87rqoBFZIZUKibMnbTOcBI-BZJ81fZ6dLtEUNP_DzJ27ux-13Y7HyiGNlOspl3M_yni-Mb7CVkmryVjY4/s400/001.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5371478185080696018" /></a><br />Children can be so insightful. My daughter Hannah wants to be a poet and I love these!Nicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-20658747716359199322009-08-18T03:33:00.000-07:002009-08-18T04:11:03.330-07:00Seeking<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyCorXac2OKWn5D3N75Lj_LuXOKTbxcfu4nACpSElV0jh8iI8-DwdVGcgf54b0DeIHmfJnaPFBM7bub9ChDN2zq62keUVc-78RbeBooQMMKq91f6A6RSy8cjs4XaaOXIvCmxn7_rUhi8s/s1600-h/summer.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 214px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 320px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5371257518299970242" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyCorXac2OKWn5D3N75Lj_LuXOKTbxcfu4nACpSElV0jh8iI8-DwdVGcgf54b0DeIHmfJnaPFBM7bub9ChDN2zq62keUVc-78RbeBooQMMKq91f6A6RSy8cjs4XaaOXIvCmxn7_rUhi8s/s320/summer.jpg" /></a><br />The moment we set off in search of love, it sets off in search of us. And saves us. I'd rather be a fountain that overflows than a cistern that merely contains. Where is the joy in trying to explain why or how you feel? Live everything intensely and treasure what you feel as a gift from Spirit. As children we had nothing to lose and we had everything. Pleasures were simple, relationships uncomplicated, emotions unquestioned. It was enough to lay on the lawn with our dreams.Nicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-81931748570738760442009-08-17T18:31:00.000-07:002009-08-18T03:29:52.854-07:00Love and Surrender<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitM44DK_rkiqDosVkOsdut7m4rNc-jtl3-kh6xq1-BcLuPbEcH3R2Xd9xWFi5ooIVgkiNwWSw-ZM-X7f-tz2KzOmI5mGvPyBGnp_DjS9QRbnAMo_JUW_4UQuLcjS72la5RlFEDcD74SeU/s1600-h/il_fullxfull_69787202.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 320px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 320px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5371131355547040962" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitM44DK_rkiqDosVkOsdut7m4rNc-jtl3-kh6xq1-BcLuPbEcH3R2Xd9xWFi5ooIVgkiNwWSw-ZM-X7f-tz2KzOmI5mGvPyBGnp_DjS9QRbnAMo_JUW_4UQuLcjS72la5RlFEDcD74SeU/s320/il_fullxfull_69787202.jpg" /></a><br /><div><span style="color:#215670;">It's been so long since I've updated this site! I recently took my little monkeys to Acadia National Park. It was beautiful! We rented a house on a quarry and surrounding the water were various rock sculptures that the property owner had carved and birds of every song. I saw my first eagle! A very significant event for me. While the eagle was circling I sent up a prayers of love and gratitude for the land and a prayer of surrender to Spirit. Surrender... It's absolutely terrifying to let go of what you dearly want. You must calmly go to a sacred place and put on a cloak of faith. I had been involved with a man that I had grown to care about in a few short weeks. I spent many minutes during my retreat feeling pleased with myself for having taken the initiative to know him. And it did take initiative, I wasn't eager to risk getting hurt again. Prior to meeting him I had been in a good place... I wasn't lonely... I wasn't needy... I wasn't <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">pre</span>-occupied. I had been content to date casually and enjoy the different people I was meeting. Anyway, ( there is a point to all this) I was sitting out on the quarry glad to have found someone I was interested in beyond dinner. And while I was thanking Spirit I was surrendering as well. The very next day, the day I came home, he ended the relationship. Ugh! Never saw it coming. So I sobbed for hours, not because I had been in love but from the disappointment and frustration of it all. I felt betrayed my own foolish heart. I was angry, defiant and felt sorry for myself. Then while sitting out on my roof to watch the sunrise, I remembered those prayers I had sent up. Ah, yes...I did agree to this ending on some level energetically. So what was the point to another heartbreak? Where's the lesson? To quote from Paulo <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Coehlo</span> ' <em>Love is not to be found in someone else, but in ourselves; we</em> <em>simply awaken to it. But in order to do that we need the other person.'</em> I now love myself a tiny<em> </em>bit more<em>.</em> I <em>love </em>that I didn't shy away from a new experience. I <em>love</em> my courage, my openness, that my spirit hasn't been broken. I <em>love</em> my fragility. And I <em>love</em> that I'm not intimidated by rejection or indifference. Love is like looking at the same mountain from different angles. Do I wish I loved myself a little bit less right now and was still with my boyfriend? Sure, I'm only human. But since that wasn't in the stars I might as well throw up my hands, surrender, and heart me a little bit more.</span></div><br /><br /><div><span style="color:#215670;"></span></div><br /><br /><div><span style="color:#215670;"></span></div><br /><br /><div><span style="color:#215670;">* photo by G. Kai</span></div><br /><div></div>Nicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-67777885810670349492009-04-14T10:51:00.000-07:002009-04-14T11:06:43.546-07:00Just a thought..I'm sitting outside with my face in the sun for the first time in what feels like forever, enjoying a moment of nothingness. I have been feeling so disconnected from Spirit these past few weeks. I have been busy trying to create a business, and so my daily meditations have lapsed and I find myself mumbling apologetically to my ancestors every time I sit down on the computer rather than in circle with them. So here I am, being warmed by the sun, <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">simultaneously</span> thanking Grandfather for that blessing and <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">apologizing</span> for my neglect when a thought drifts in. Isn't creativity..the act of creation, an extension of our souls and the grandest display of Spirit? Why must I lay prone in silence or sit chanting mantra to show my devotion? To feel connected? We honor Spirit in the <em>doing</em> not just the<em> being. </em>And lately I have been doing much. I am the co-creator of my life. I have someone else on my team and when my soul is following the path it was meant to follow my teammate and I work so beautifully together it's as if we are <em>one. </em><br /><em>-</em><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Nic</span>Nicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-23064203168794660462009-03-31T04:15:00.000-07:002009-08-18T03:19:30.402-07:00<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9d1Ls_wXOUELzXIG5kscdOwuZgV0KvRsBpdRtHu21JaDXVwVhCZcv379XkcdiMLuA3APmYVAD4rXx-DrismOLadmleu1sSWXKeScHse-91XedrKZyNZMGy2khaQWW_YAT5gh6RoJffoo/s1600-h/Untitled-1+copy.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 214px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5371246425194878322" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9d1Ls_wXOUELzXIG5kscdOwuZgV0KvRsBpdRtHu21JaDXVwVhCZcv379XkcdiMLuA3APmYVAD4rXx-DrismOLadmleu1sSWXKeScHse-91XedrKZyNZMGy2khaQWW_YAT5gh6RoJffoo/s320/Untitled-1+copy.jpg" /></a><br /><div>My restless mind is reminding me to love the shadows as well as the light... in the shadows lay the mystery, the learning. We may carry scars from walking into the unknown, but we also carry the moments that would not have happened if we didn't dare to go beyond our limits. And how much more do we love the sunlight after a day of rain?</div>Nicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-90090397325810291352009-03-25T10:12:00.000-07:002009-03-27T17:52:45.987-07:00PoetryMany moons ago I had some poetry published in a modest journal. I could no longer recite what I had written. The bulk of it had to do with childhood memories that were less than <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">pleasant</span>, punctuated on occasion with the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">naivety</span> and whimsy of an eight year old. I did love to write though, keeping my musings to myself, stashing them away in a creased journal kept between my mattress'. I felt the urge to write again this past winter and the words came effortlessly. My structure is off to be sure, and I couldn't tell you the difference between a ballad an ode or an <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">alexandrine</span></span> but here's two that I like. Maybe their rubbish, but an artist is their own worse critic and I rather like them.<br /><br />SAVING GRACE<br />On a footpath well worn by her grandmothers<br />She walks on<br />Memories of lovers are silenced like fallen heroes<br />Laid to rest beneath her glass slippers<br />Her gown trailing behind filthy and worn<br />Her bejeweled hair falling limp<br />Under tissue thin voile and frayed silks<br />A handmaid<br />Of ordinary marrow, wearied from her endeavors<br />Walks on<br />And as her adornment falls away the<br />Delicate armour beneath lays witness to a birthright<br />She had forgotten<br />With no steed in sight nor banners winnowing<br />And with no trumpets to herald her arrival<br />She walks on<br />A princess on a mission to save herself<br /><br /><br />THE JOURNEY<br />Small and vulnerable she stumbles along her path<br />Kicking up dust, harvesting sustenance<br />Posing seeds<br />Her weathered face turns upward in gratitude<br />The sunlight a balm on her heart<br />Mending it once more<br />She sighs<br />Perseverance<br />Surrender<br />Exhaustion<br />She seeks shade, solace<br />From her knowing<br />And allows herself a moment of <em>nothingness</em><br />Time passes<br />Her youth returns to her and with arms wide open<br />She embraces a new path<br /><br />- <em>Nicole Evangeline Grace</em>Nicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-12674032049588609742009-03-12T18:08:00.000-07:002009-03-12T18:55:55.142-07:00AwohaliMy given Cherokee name, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Awohali</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Aghya</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Gagi</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Nvda</span>, is hard enough to say let alone live up to. It means Eagle Woman Who Rises to the Sun. I am trying though. I have always been fascinated with altered states of perception and drawn to shamanic realities. Eagle medicine teaches us to take on the responsibility and power of becoming so much more than we think we are. You learn to move between worlds and touch all of life with healing. From a karmic aspect it takes an individual lifetimes to reach a place where the repercussions of everything done or said ( or not done or said) will be strong and swift. It's a constant learning process. Here are some characteristics of Eagle that those with this totem will be working with.<br /><p></p><p>- An <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">increased</span> ability and need to learn to work with emotions, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">psychisms</span> and all aspects of spirituality with greater control.</p><p>- There must be involvement with creativity.</p><p>- A willingness to experience extremes, there will be tests of faith.</p><p>- And, a willingness to dig deep, to seek out the true emotional aspects of yourself , and by doing so to rediscover the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">lost</span> child and awaken to a higher sense of purity, creativity, passion and healing.</p><p></p>Nicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-2133347035879956352009-02-17T14:44:00.000-08:002009-02-17T14:49:17.878-08:00Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart, and try to love the questions themselves, as if they were locked rooms... or books written in a foreign language. Don't search for answers which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the question now. Perhaps then, someday, far in the future, you will gradually without even noticing it, live your way into the answer. R RilkeNicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1780649955143734566.post-15772109861614863422008-11-19T17:22:00.000-08:002009-08-18T04:25:57.888-07:00sSince I was a child I have been drawn to Native American ure. It wasn't until recently I learned that a twig or two on my otherwise Italian/Scotch family tree was American Indian. That was all I needed to take up in earnest a long time passion to immerse myself in that world the best that I could. So, always a very spiritual person but very <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">un</span></span>-religious I found where my ideas of creation and spirituality best fit, and that's in s<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">hamanism</span></span>. I've studied various lineages,Peruvian, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Salishan</span></span>, Nepalese, Cherokee, with some wonderful elders, and now my soul has come home. So...who am I? Well, a mother first, photographer, art teacher, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Reiki</span></span> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">practitioner</span> and ic energy worker. The in me wants to share in writing various musings of my teachings and the photographer wants to share in pictures what captures my eye. I hope something here speaks to your soul and I may add another kindred spirit to my family.<br />Shamanism is the earliest spiritual practice known to mankind. Although the word "shaman" is actually a Siberian term for spiritual healer, ism has been practiced on every continent throughout history. s walk between the worlds of the seen and unseen. They interact directly with the spirit world to address the spiritual aspects of illness, perform community ceremony, divine information, perform soul retrievals, and help deceased people cross over. They wear many hats in the community..healers, psychotherapists, storytellers,mystics and priests.Shamans believe that everything that exists has a spirit and that we are all joined with the earth and all of life....a web of life that connects everything and all of us together. They can understand the cycles of nature and read the signs that come with these cycles of movement and change.<br />There are two types of helping spirits that s consult and work with: power animals, also known as guardian spirits, and teachers in human form. We all have a power animal that walks beside us (or flies overhead, slithers along, etc) that we can connect to for guidance and strength. I know that for many that have come to me an exciting part of the work we do together is discovering this ally. My hope is to create an online resource for those interested in knowing more about ism as a spiritual practice.Nicolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08132474109035036651noreply@blogger.com0